E portfolio

About me

My name is Destinee Clinkscales and I came from the city and I came to NIU to grow as a
person and a professional. Ever since I was a little girl I would see my mom sat at her computer
for hours and hours trying to complete her MBA and her dedication is what inspires me to keep
going. I was a little girl and I realized that being hard working and getting your education.
I love being able to say that I graduated high school and I am now pursuing a bachelors in
computer science. I am proud that I have an example like my mom to look up to. Both of my
parents are really hard working and I have learned so much from them. Independence is
another thing that I learned from them and too this day has become a big influence on
my decisions and how I think.  I am also very expressive when it comes it comes to knowing
what I want and accomplishing my goals. I have been determined from all those days I’ve seen
my parents struggle. I always told myself and they have always told me that I need to make
something of myself. So I say everyday Destinee Tenia Clinkscales you will make something
of yourself. This marinates in my head everyday it’s like my engine it keeps me going. Life has
taught me a lot about needing to change and how learning is growth and growth is good. 

Reflection

The paper that focused on analysis was the microtheme. When I was choosing a topic to write
about I picked the problem that bothered me the most which is why I am going to be analyzing
the media’s beauty standards.  Knowing how strong I felt about that topic made me want to dig
deeper into the topic. As Dr. Kyburz was preparing me to write a paper that had a strict focus
on one thing and that was one page long I was really confused at first but after multiple talks
with her I was able to understand what she was asking me. As I started writing I first wrote
about how the topic connected to me. I had to analyze how the topic connected with me and
make the connection know in the paper and I took from there. Discussed what the causes were
and I just analyzed those but the paper said I was not allowed to solve the problem which drove
me to dig deeper into the problem. I can honestly say that I really enjoyed writing this paper
because it was something that I have never done before. I loved the project and I am thankful
that I was able to adjust to a different writing style and grow my library of writing work. 

The project I would connect with this is the exploratory essay. I learned how to add narrative
glue as Dr. Kyburz would call it to the research that I have found and I like that much more than
just introducing a quote. Again this allows me to comment on what I am researching. I’m glad
it allowed me to do this because it allowed me to really process the quotes and really get into
the research. It actually made the paper more interesting for me. I worked with three outside
sources and they were well picked because it fit perfectly with my paper. I also would say that
I had to analyze the quotes and explain why I decided to put them in my paper. It was nice that
I was able to write my thoughts while researching.  The voices of other writers in this piece
were from healthcare professionals which I needed to help back up my claim or topic of the
essay. I made sure that my sources were valid and that the information was credible. That's
another thing this paper taught me was to make sure that your sources are really credible and
the authors have the right credentials. I felt like everything flowed in my paper. 

I would say the project I did in class that would most connect to this is the personal essay
because it allowed me to write about my crazy hectic life which I label as the genre drama.
In the essay I was sure to keep the audience with the stories and dialog I had within the essay.
At first it was hard for me to write this but I was able to get over my emotions and with
Dr. Kyburz constantly encourages me to be authentic and to write about everything I remember
such as sound, feelings and other sensory things so I can really appeal to the audience. I was
able to bring out a side of me I never used before in my writing and I really appreciated this
experience. It taught me how to establish a genre and to hold an audience's attention. 

Overall I really appreciate this course because it allowed me to grow as a writer and strengthen
my writing skills. I really felt confident in my writing and the work I have done in this course is
some of the work that I am very proud of. I learned how to be an authentic writer and I will
always use this skill. I actively participated in class because I was really into the content and
what my professor was teaching me. I grew from just writing a paper just to write for a grade
to actually enjoying writing and diving deep into the material. I learned to analyze a topic and
dig deeply into a subject. I learned how to write with sources and narrative glue which means
include my own thoughts. I also learned how to write with a genre and keep my audience’s
attention. I will really miss this course and I am hopeful going into english 203.

personal essay reflection

Writing my personal essay was hard for me especially because I'm not use to spilling my emotions out in the open like that. It was so hard trying not to cry while I was writing my personal essay and I couldn't believe I was even able to let so much out. My heart felt like a thousand pounds beating inside my chest. I like being able to express my emotions tho. I was able to get this off of my chest and I felt so much better. I'm glad I was given this assignment and share a little bit about my life. I was especially scared open up about my depression and not knowing how people would react to the fact that I have major depressive disorder. I learned that authenticity is the best policy when writing a paper like this. I learned a lot about myself in this paper and a lot about this writing style. I also learned for the first time that whenever there is dialog in a paper you have to make it a paragraph on it's own. I am grateful to have learned this skill and I will continue to use it in my writing throughout my whole college career.  So again I really appreciated this project and I hope I am able to do more writing like this again sometime in college. 

Selfcare

This quote is really hitting me hard and I feel like most days I am the sunshine in many peoples lives except for my own and I feel horrible because I can always cheer someone else up but not myself. Again I feel my depression getting the best of me while I'm here. So instead of being everyone else's sunshine I have to start being my own sunshine. It warms my heart when my friends and other people say that I made their day better. I felt like I contributed something positive to the world. While all this may be nice what about Destinee's happiness? For next week my goal is to focus on my own happiness instead of everyone else I need self care time as Dr. Kyburz always mentions. That is exactly what I'm going to do.

This is what is what I don't understand and I'm still having trouble understanding this I always thought relaxing was something you do as a reward not a necessity that's what my parents taught me. I have now learned that this is not true and this is something that you need to do in order to keep yourself up. I will now start doing this and focus on me. #selfcareisimportant

My New found family

I am so excited that I can call two people that mean a lot to me family. I met them in august and spending time with them everyday has made me even closer to them. Not everyone is going to sit there while your balling your eyes out about some family issues and console you. Not everyone is going to pick up the phone in the middle of the night just because you have a nightmare but these to friends will.  At first it was hard letting someone get so close me and the last person to get this close to me was my boyfriend and we've been strong and sticking together for 2.5 years. I get tired of him sometimes yes but he has become like my family and not I have an addition. My dad could tell that I was happier about being at school so I told him about my new found family and he said just be aware don't get too relaxed around them.


I believe this is going to workout I mean again positivity is key and it's what's going to get me through college. I hope I never lose my friends. I understand that not everything is going to be peachy. Welll I'm nervous but lets see how this goes. I hope I didn't speak too soon.

Staying positive

Through trying to get through this negative vibes I have about NIU this quote really speaks to me. I'm starting to think maybe it's because I'm not opening my mind wide enough to new experiences. Maybe if I start being positive and opening my mind the experience will get better. OK I'm taking this idea and I'm running with it. I am going to keep my head held high and I'm going to keep pushing through this regret I have about choosing this school. I can't move forward with negative energy.

I may be feeling like I don't wanna be here but my depression isn't helping me stay positive but it's going to be okay. I'm going to keep looking at positive quotes and keep the positive vibes flowing in and the negative vibes flowing out. I also have God on my side. I got this!

College life update

I am ready to pull my hair out and I want to get back to my city and I want to be able to go home after school like high school. I love my classes but I wanna transfer to a college in my home town. I feel like I'm going crazy and my parents keep asking me why I keep coming back here and I keep telling her I miss it at home and she won't listen. I even told my mentor I don't like here.  I wanna be like one of my closest cousins who just goes to class and goes home and goes to work. I get so envious of here because I don't have that option because I live too far away from that school.



Like my GIF above GET ME OUT OF HERE! I am tired of NIU but maybe not the whole NIU just my social life here. I love my classes and my professors I just hate the environment in which they both exist in like god can I move the location of the school. So I talk to my mom every night and she reassures me that everything will be OK but everything keeps going in one ear and coming out of the other.  God please get me through this.

College life so far

Oh how I miss Chicago. I miss being able to sit down and have dinner with my family. Sitting in the living room talking and watching TV. Now I sit in my dorm room and cry because I miss these moments. After the first weekend I moved in I have been going home every weekend and I am trying so hard not to go back. Dekalb is so boring compared to my home. There was always something to do in Chicago and I find myself sooooo bored all the time. I am a really big family person and grew up around a lot of people so this was definitely a difficult time for me.  I am slowly adjusting to this but I am considering transferring to a college in Chicago.


I talk to my family everyday and they tell me to stay strong and fight through the urge to come home and that they will always love me. But me being Destinee that went in one ear and came out the other.  I miss them so much and little do they know I can't stand being this far from them. They mean the world to me and I love them so much. I can't wait till my next visit to Chicago.